Playing with Knives
by Preussan
Summary: As Belarus finally develops feelings for a nation other than her brother, she deals with internal fear over whether she should express her feelings or not. A journey fo creating new friends begins, along with her internal conflict of telling Denmark of her fierce love for him.
1. Chapter 1

Belarus had lay her head down on the large, round table, her heair pooling about her. She hated world meetings, since they always involved arguing. In the end, she really just wanted to stab them all in the tongue. Especially England and France and America, sine they always started it. It wasn't that she disliked them for them, just them for how they acted with certain countries. She looked over to her brother, Ivan, and saw the childish smile on his face as he sat, watching the Chinese boy across the table. She sighed; Even now, after having finally gotten over him, she still felt pangs of jealousy. Not because she wanted his attention, but because she was his own sister, someoen he'd done horrible things to, and she never once deserved it in his eyes. Yet this country, one didn't even like him, was his centre of attention. She sighed, thinking to herself.

_Oh well. I better get used to it. Since I'm not going to stalk him anymore, I'll hardly see him, anyways. _

She looked around the room, looking at the faces of evey person in there. She put her head back down, not seeing whoever it was she wanted to.

"Heeeeeeey! Sorry I'm late. " She lifted her head up, having heard the doors open.

_Oh, so he's here..._

He sat with his brothers, the Nordics, and grinned like always, a silly man. Belarus held a shy smile on her face, happy to see that he was still chipper as ever.

"Very well. Is there any other order of business?" Germany was already irritated, and Belarus had an important announcement to make.

Yes, Belarus. You may speak." She stood from seat, continuously looking down at the table, before getting the nerve to state her sentence.

"The Republic of Belarus would just like to... To notify all countries that we... We uh..." She swallowed the air in her mouth, her hands shaking a little.

"We are no longer on friendly terms with Russia. We fear he will some day attempt to retake the country, and so by not only my boss' choice, but mine as well, we are cutting our ties."

She looked around at the faces, realizing she may have sounded even more insane than usual. One year she's screaming at him to marry her, and the next she's wanting nothing to do with him.

"Is there a... Reason why this information was shared, Belarus?"

"Da. Our country has always been close in relation with the Communists, and realize that a big fear of our's is being taken over by Russia. I would like to point that out in case the UN ever wonders why Belarus may have become a part of the Communists." She sat back down, looking around, and realized that he smiled even more. Russia didn't have his smile, neither did ukraine. America was beaming with happiness... But he smiled at her. As she looked at him, he smiled at her. Her heart fluttered.

A hand fell on her shoulder, and she turned around, her hand filled with blades. You couldn't touch Belarus: She'd rip out your throat. But she thrust her hands behind her back, as soon as she saw who had wanted her.

"Ye did a good job today, Nat!" He grinned even wider, and she could smell the beer on his breath.

"Spasibo, Jeg." She managed to say, her throat closing in on itself. His smile was captiviating... So happy and full of his personality. But she could hardly bring herself to do one naturally.

"No problem! Oh, ye were smilin' when I came in today. Ye should do that more often!"

He walked away after giving her a friendly wave, and she continued walking out the doors to the long walk home.

_He saw me smile? I should do it more often? What does that mean? _She asked herself, biting her bottom lip as she felt the lingering touch of his hand on her shoulder.


	2. Chapter 2

Minsk was beautiful in the summer. Lush greenery, bustling streets, and beautiful rivers. Natalia loved walking around, and she often wore clothing other than her dress. Today, though, she had felt lonely. She wore the dress Ivan gave her, not caring what the people around her thought. She knew, form mere looks, that most thought she a model of some sort. Ivan ahd always told ehr she was very pretty...

She sat on the banks of the Nemiga river, daydreaming quietly as children play in the park behind her. She hardly heard the lauighter and screams, her mind focused on the oncoming snow of the winter season. It was always so cold there in Minsk, and the prices were rising... She was losing all her money, but the last thing she'd even bought for herself was the yarn she needed to make her own clothing! All those other nations could afford to buy designer clothing...

"Hey! Miss Natalia!" A voice broke her from her thoughts, her dark blue eyes blinking as she tried to refocus on what was going on. She looked about her, twisting until she say a pair of faded blue jeans, but the face she couldn't see. The sun was shining too brightly behind whoever it was.

""O-oh, it's Toris. You probbaly can't see, can you..." He sat down beside her, and she tipped her parasol back so he could see her face.

"How long have you been sititng there, Miss Natalia?" He smiled awkwardly at her, expecting her to ignore his question.

"About three hours..." She sighed, looking up at the position fo the sun in the sky. It was only two, but that was a long time for anyone. She hadn't gotten anything done yet... It looked like she wasn't going to, too.

"Do you have any plans, miss Natalia?" He flashed her a smile, and she twirled her parasol lightly, thinking.

"I did. I've wasted too much time here, though." She grimaced, remembering that she had to go to an important meeting today with her governor, she needed to prepare for the oncoming winter, too...

"A date with me?" Natalia looked towards Toris, her eyes questioning his sentence. She hadn't been paying attention, until he'd said that...

"I-i-i-i-it's okay if you don't want to!" He stuttered, embarrassed at his bravery in asking her out. He'd already stood to leave before she could answer him, which made her feel a little guilty.

"I'll go with you, Toris." the words sounded odd in her mouth, a feeling rising in her chest. She'd never accepted Toris... Even though he was always there for her. He just didn't understand how hard it was for her to see it when she was in her state of mind. She had always thought about how she treated him after the fact, when she broke his leg or his fingers... It was easier for her to pretend there was a justified reason for such actions... Which to her, they almost were. He shouldn't have held her hand, he was asking for such treatment!

The "date" flew by quickly, since she didn't talk much. Lithuania was happy just knowing she was willing to be with him, and she felt a little warmth inside her as she caught on to it. He took her to Lido, a self-serve place with amazing food. Her entire time was spent nibbling the sweetest treats she could get out of the waiter, constantly calling him for more.

He took her shopping down-town, buying her a brand new pink bow to wear. He spoiled her... He gave her whatever she liked, she didn't have to say a word. He's simply ring it up and hand her the item, even if she tried to reject it. But that insisting smile he gave her made it hard to keep saying no to what he'd spent money on...

"Spasibo for everything, Toris..." The thanks came out like a whisper, as Natalia twiddled her thumbs. Toris looked nice in those clothes, red flanell fit him well. She opened the door to her house, turning on the lights. It was past midnight, and she was just returning home... Walking inside, she threw the things onto the floor of her living room, thumping down onto her couch afterwards. She sighed, resting her achign legs and feet from all the walking she'd done today.

_The world_

_the people..._

_the kindness_

_Who would show you_

_Why would he love you_

_You're nothi-_

She was awoken from the thoughts pounding in her skull by her phone ringing obnoxiously from her kitchen. She trudged to it, taking it from the wall and holding it between her cheek and shoulder.

"Pryvit?"

"Natalia! I've been callin' ya all day? Where been?"

Her heart stopped in her chest, her body trembling.

"Hello? Nat?"

"... Is there something you need?"

"Yeah, to know where' ya been."

"On a date... With toris."

"A date? With that guy? Why! You could have gone on one with me! Ha ha!"

the laugh was reassuring her, giving her a sense of hope that she wasn't going to be moving in with anyone any time soon.

"He asked me to, Alfred..." She whispered, clenching the phone in her hand.

"Well, next time, you should say no."

The line went dead, as she stood quietly, a phone hanging from its cord on the wall.


	3. Chapter 3

Natalia lay her head down on the table, listening to the countries ramble on with one another. Another World Meeting... Why were they having them so often? Was something going on? A war? A global crisis? Was someone invading another country? Her thoughts were quickly interrupted as the Italy brothers, very carelessly, sat down beside her, having a tiff over something irrelevent to a world meeting. She glanced at the two, wondering when they would jump up and scream, maybe stutter an apology, or just run away. To her surprise, they hardly noticed her.

"Feliciano, I can't believe you're still'a hanging around that'a tomato bastard!"

"B-but'a Lovino! Germany's a'nice~!" North Italy cried, shaking his brother's arm lightly. Natalia watched them, her long blonde locks sprawled over the table, shrouding her icy blue eyes from them. Germany wasn't so bad. He didn't openly express his dislike of her or how terrified of her he is. She watched the two out of mere curiosity, eyes gleaming quietly. Then little Romano's eyes stumbled over her's, and he stood, iparalyzed for a mere second. His golden eyes were locked on the icy orbs, not trembling like she thought they would. They held her stare for long enough time for Feliciano to become curios...

She turned her head over, watching the others around the room. She was sure, in some way, she'd saved Romano from some sort of embarrassment or danger. Anyone taking interest in her would certainly feel the wrath of Ivan...

Her eyes shone with amusement, watching all conversations going on, even though not a single word really hit her ears until now. She tended to listen when he spoke, knowing it was usually something that would give her a discreet smile. She knew something was going on, she knew he was speaking, but for some reason, she couldn't hear him.

Panic almost settled in, until she realized he wasn't talking to anyone. He was mumbling to himself, as Arthur began to speak. She could have watched him for hours, days, weeks, months, decades... Unless he decided to look in her direction, which he did. He broke her trance before his eyes fully caught her's. She'd began to scan the room dully before he had completely caught the wandering eyes, trained on some sort of radiance from his foreign face. His eyes were a clear, bright blue, with dark blonde hair, crazy and untamed, like he was. She could feel the sides of her mouth tugging up in a small smile, because for some reason, he made her want to scream. Scream to the world that she'd stopped crying frozen tears, waiting for her brother love her the way she did him. Was this what happiness finally felt like? Was this what it felt like to acutally, genuinly care for the feelings of another being, rather than her own? Was this what it was like to feel content with merely knowing they were here?

Absolutely.

She would never let this moment escape her, the moment _she_ caught _him_ staring. She let the smile fall form her lips, only to amuse herself. He stopped once he saw she'd noticed him, once he saw her smile fade. He adverted his eyes from her, and she wanted to burst.

_Look at me! Look at me, please, just once more! _

But then she stopped, realizing too late, that she'd already threw back her chair and stomped her way out of the room. She looked around, not recognizing where she was. There were no windows, no paintings, nothing here that told her what way to go to leave the building. When a hand placed itself on her shoulder, she turned and threw the knife into it.

"... Oh... Vanya..." the words escaped her lips, almost terrifyingly fast. His hand was bleeding, and he wasn't playing her up with his usual fake smile.

"Not only have you been avoiding me, but you stab me. That is a good way to say hello, da?"

The words stung a bit, and he must have seen this on her face. He gave a little smile, before grabbing her chin to force her ot look at his eyes.

"And now you go around running out of the place like something actually happened to you. How quaint. What, are you sad to see some other guy playing it up with someone else?"

She shook her head in disbelief... How had he known she was interested in someone else? Did he see her smile at Matthias? Did he think it was Romano?

She looked up, hearing the childish cackle of his laugh, and her face contorted into some beast of a smile. She wrapped her delicate fingers around his throat, and shoved him to the floor.

"You think you're so great, da?!" She screamed the words, paying no attention to the Baltivs behind her.

"You can do whatever you want. You can say whatever you want! You're worthless, nothing, you don't deserve the love I tried to offer!"

Her teeth were gritted, her eyes wild with fury that she could no longer contain. What was that she had heard? A whimper ?Did his words stop? Oh, it must be his last breath... How peaceful he looks, laying in her own world she'd just created.

"Natalia!" The hands were over her, grabbing and pulling and hurting, almost like she were the enemy!

She opened her eyes, mad with a hunger she couldn't remember ever feeling. Was it because she'd felt betrayed, or because she was still angry with Ivan? The look on his face...

She wrapped her arms around him, sobs wracking her petite, slender body. She could hardly come to reality, one she didn't want to face. she'd attacked Ivan, who'd been attacking her for years. The marks weren't noticeable... Who else would think he'd be the reason she's gone crazy?

"I'm... Sorry, Mathias... I-I-I don't know what happened. He said so many mean things..." The words poured from her mouth, like the tears spilling over uncontrollably. She almost stabbed him, too, when she felt the sudden embrace. She had never felt so safe... in the arms of someone who she hardly ever spoke to. Yet something was too familiar. This was hwat she'd yearned for, the feeling of safety and comfort int he arms of someone, anyone who would have her. Why was it that he, of all people, was able to give her this?

"I'll take you home, Natalia, oka-"

"No!" The words boomed about the hall, everyone in shock at her sudden voice. Even Alfred was staring at her, watching her with a slight fear, mixed with worry and curiosity. Her eyes locked on his, and he gave her a weak smile. Some times, he wasn't so shady.

Then again, he wasn't all that bad.

"I don't want to go home. Vanya will find me..." She could hardly whisper the last part, knowing anyone would be able to tell from her words, something was happening behind the scenes. Mathias nodded his head, and gave a wide grin.

"Well, Berwald, Lukas, Emil, Tino and I can stay with ya' at my place!"

The thought was kind, so kind she gave a weak smile. Of course, it was just his personality to let some unkown woman, deemed a mad person, stay with him and his family. So kind, caring, and stupid, it was endearing.

"Spasibo..."


	4. Chapter 4

Natalia didn't have a quiet night, she was sure, since she was continuously bombarded with nightmare after nightmare. She wondered if the Nordics despised her for her constant thrashing around, her constant screams. She slept in one of Norway's button up shirts, since he was near her size. She sat up in her bed, rubbing her eyes, still asleep. She was hardly aware when Denmark, as obnoxious as ever, crashed through his bedroom door, up and awake at nine in the morning. He jumped onto the bed, grinning at his newest, (and only) house guest. Natalia rubbed her eyes, hardly registering anything that was happening. It was like this every morning: It'd take her an hour to even half-wake up, and then another for her to get to her normal self, on a good day. She looked to Denmark's eyes, trying to think clearly, until he wrapped his arms around her little frame, dragging her out of the room.  
"Guys! Guys! Look at 'er! She's so... Cute when she's sleeping!" He shouted to his brothers, who were congregating around the dinner table. They looked up at her, her eyes drowsy and her face innocent. Finland smiled, while the others continued with their breakfast. She wasn't sure what was going on, or what they were saying, until it hit her: Denmark called her cute. She turned around quickly, walking back into his room to gather her things. She slipped off the boxers Finland had let her borrow as shorts, throwing them onto the bed. She picked up her dress and apron, throwing them on it, too. She unbuttoned the shirt, looking around for some sort of basket to put the dirtied clothes in.  
_Does he not keep a laundry basket in his room?_

She opened the closet doors, her eyes searching quickly for some where to put the clothing. She turned around, before stopping in her tracks. Denmark had just opened the door, and he was staring at her. She grit her teeth, clenched her fists, and almost slapped him.  
"Why are you following me?" She asked, throwing the clothes on the floor and slipping on her stockings.  
"You were angry... I came to see if ye' were okay." He stammered, uncontrollably adverting his eyes from her and then back to her.  
"Da, I am angry!" She burst out, slipping her knives into their appropriate holders on her legs.  
"But why? What did I do?"  
"You called me cute!"  
"Is that a crime?" He asked, grabbing her hand to keep her from stomping angrily out the door. She turned, slamming a fist into his chin. He didn't move, and she let her hand fall to her side. He rubbed the wounded bone, wincing slightly at the touch. Natalia blushed a bit, some how finding it enjoyable that she'd had such courage towards him.  
"I only stopped ye 'cuz ye don't have any clothes on." He mumbled, his face growing a shade of crimson pink.  
Natalia looked downn at herself, clad in black and pink lacey bra and panties. Her face hardly colored, for she often went nude in her own home, and at Russia's. At that moment, an adventure to Denmark's room seemed to have been in place, for the other Nordic countries made themselves known as they slammed open his bedroom door. Natalia and AMthias stared at his brothers, each one's face growing a brighter shade of red as they took in her appearance. She scowled, having thought they were judging her, or going to make fun of her.

"What? Is there a problem?" She snapped, staring at them with daggers in her eyes. Sweden pushed Tino out the door, while Norway pushed Emil further in the room. Emil turned back to Lukkas, almost ready to punch him.  
Natalia watched the three men, a blush forming on her face along with a scowl setting deeper on her lips. She hardly understood why her appearance mattered, she was just a normal nation, right? So what, she was on of few female nations? France didn't discrimminate, or at least, she thought he didn't.  
She turned, grabbing her dress, slipping it on over her head, before buttoning the front of it. She put on her bow, then pushed her way through the door. None of the men turned to stop her, nor did they mutter a word.

She sat on the plane, the flight attendents speaking in some foreign language she didn't understand. Her fingers clawed at the seats, needing some way to occupy themselves from the fear of flying. It was a little weird; the terrifying Belarus afraid of flying? Ridicluous.

Only Alfred really knew, since he saw her nearly cry when she got off the plane at his house. She had stayed with him for a little while in the past, and everyone called him her "adoptive brother." He really wasn't, they were more like in sort of open relationship. Or something. Their bosses called it something like that. She didn't really consider it anything but a slight alliance and agreement to help her regain control over her government. The flight attendants steered clear of her. Then again, who wouldn't? It was obvioud she wasn't the most sane at the moment, and most people kept clear of her only for the way she dressed.

The flight was long; She had been prepared for it, and chewed gum, pretending she were in the park in Minsk once again. She stared out the window, imagining herself as little blackbird, its waings carrying her far in the sky, as free as she could ever come to be. What would it be like to no longer be an eternal being? What if she could just live a normal life? What if she'd never been born into this Hell called being a nation?

She'd have never met Mathias.

The plane landed, and she stepped off, walking inside the airport quietly, as she always was. Many people rushed past her, many stared, and they spoke with hushed voices. She ignored their looks, their criticism, and decided she'd need a taxi. Or maybe she could walk. She wasn't sure where she was, though, so she decided a taxi would be better. She flagged one of the yellow cabs done, before saying in a thick accent where she wanted to go.

"Are ya' form some other country?" Teh driver asked, the smoke from his tobacco clogging her nose.

"Da, Belarus." She answered coldly, her head turned to stare out the window. Nothing else was said, and she asummed he had heard the knives in her voice. He dropped her off in fornt of her destination, where she pressed a caller at the gate.  
"Hello?"

"Natalia Arlovskaya to visit, please."

The large gate opened, and she began her trek to the house.

She stepped inside, the many guards waving to her and smiling at her, having remembered her form her last visit a few months ago. They often told her to "come back soon" since she used to visit much more often, but she never really felt like it. There were some really amazing memories attached to this place. She aboslutely hated it. She knew what room she was going to, she knew what she would see, and braced herself for the revolt. Opening the door, he was still, laying on his bed belly down, in slacks, a white, tucked in shirt, and a poorly tied tie. She almost smiled a bit; she had seen this many times before, and it reminded her that there were times to take a break. She walked over, sitting gently on the edge of his bed, and ran her gentle fingers through his hair, before feeling the slap of a hand against her wrist. She nearly jumped out of her skin! She looked down, her eyes meeting the clearest blue orbs she'd ever seen. He grinned at her, and adjusted his glasses.

"Hey, Natalia. What're you doing here?"

"I didn't know where else to go, Alfred."


	5. Chapter 5

Natalia soon began to regret her decision of visiting Alfred. Why had she, anyways? Back in the nineties, she'd lived with him. He and her brother despised one another, thanks to the Cold War. Not to mention, he was a filthy pervert who had no remorse about how he had broken her frigid little heart. He'd been trying for years to make it up to her, she knew that, but the problem was that she could never forgive him. After all the pain she felt over her brother, she'd grown to love Alfred, and then he, too, tore her to pieces. Natalia curled up in his arms, feeling somewhat awkward. She was always so confused about the things he did for her or let her do. Even when Vietnam cried when he left, he ignored her and shrugged her off. He never did such thing to Natalia, even though he could without any fear of her brother declaring war for hurting her soul. Either way, the first thing he had done after she said she needed to be away from everyone, was grabbing her and nuzzling her into him. He was always very warm, compared to her icy skin and voice and looks. He always had a warm smile on his face, not to mention his country was burning like flames in the summer. He wasn't asleep anymore, since he wasn't snoring and his glasses were set snugly on his face. He kept his eyes closed, wondering what would happen if he pretended.

He did that a lot. Once she'd made the mistake of falling for it, causing a steamy mess when she lived with him. It ended with him soaking in a hot bath to try and get rid of the aches the bruises he'd received from an angry and flushed Natalia.

She stayed where he had laid her, not daring to move in her condition. Angering him wasn't an option: She knew she didn't have it in herself to have another person hate her today. Maybe leaving when he was actually asleep would work better in her favor?

"Nat?" She looked up, catching Alfred's eyes staring at her own. She wrinkled her nose, frowning as she saw concern and wonder in his eyes. "What?"

"You're crying. Why? What's wrong, does this upset you?"

Natalia's hand pressed against her face, her fingertips glimmering with shimmering tears. She wasn't sure why she was crying, all she knew was that it was the first time she'd done it without a real reason. Well, a reason she was fully aware of, at least. She looked back to Alfred, his eyes staring down at her, more taken by her fresh tears and seeing so much emotion exploding on her face, than worried about her lack of comfort and self-assurance. He should have been worried that she didn't slap him. He should have been so worried, just by having her there with him. She sat up quickly, tearing open a drawer from his dresser. A slight smile came across her face. He never changed, always keeping something for her to change in. She opened the door to his private bathroom, slipping out of her dress to take a shower. The water was hot on her skin, and she lathered Axe shampoo into her hair. It smelled amazing, what was the type?

_Dark temptation?_ She laughed. _Seems just like him._

Natalia was content in the bathroom, her hair pulled into a large bun on the top of her head, while she was wrapped in a white towel, brushing her teeth with a black toothbrush that Alfred had bought her years ago. She never understood why he kept these things. Sure, they didn't collect as much dust as the Civil War uniform he had upstairs or the musket, but still. She always had to wonder why he kept these things cleaned and ready for her. She spat the tooth paste in her mouth into the sink, and rinsed her mouth out with freezing cold water. She looked ta herself in the mirror, and sighed. There were obvious signs of lack of nourishment and distress showing on her face and body. She sighed.  
_Is this what Vanya really wanted to have me go through? _

"Nat." Alfred called, sitting on the couch in his living room. Natalia looked up from the book she was reading, having been laying on his bed. He'd always enjoyed the outrageously unrealistic books, like "Harry Potter" and "The Hobbit." She never really got into either one, but she adored the sequel, "The Lord of the Ring." She shut the book, laying it on his dresser as she marched out to find him.  
"Da, Alfred? Is something wrong?" She asked, walking into the living room. She froze.

"Nah, but you have a guest." He said, staring at her, his face dark and solemn. Natalia couldn't move.

She couldn't _breathe._

"Natty. Somethin' wrong?" His blue eyes snapped her out of her trance. She looked at him, then Alfred, who looked as though he were ready to kill her.

In fact, he probably was.

"P-pryvit, Mathias…" She whispered, her ice-façade faltering under the eyes of two men who meant the world to her. She could hear her heart beating in her chest, and prayed that neither of them could, too.

_There's a train going by about two miles from here. One passenger's wondering what the drumming he hears is, and he thinks he's crazy._

_No, it's just the heart of Belarus!_

She wanted to run away. Would going back to her brother make this easier for her? Would she be able to gain forgiveness form him? Would he love her after she showed him she wasn't the constant he had always thought her to be? She had left him! He needed her, whether he wanted to admit it or not. He needed her, she was an asset!

"Nat, I need to talk to ya'." He mumbled, glancing at Alfred. It was obvious to Mathias America didn't want to let the Belarusian leave with him, but he really needed to talk with her. It was important enough that he came to America, after searching in Ukraine, Russia, and even Lithuania. He knew that, if it were none of those places, the only person she could go to (in her mind) would be America.

The stupid jack ass.

Natalia looked at Alfred, before nodding her head sheepishly, since he didn't give her any signs of protest. Denmark smiled a bit, opening the door for her to exit from. She slipped on her shoes; the ones Alfred had went out and bought her three days ago. They matched her new pink dress he'd bought her, too. It was just above the knee, frilling out like her old one, but with thick straps and ribbons on the torso. They walked out of the building, Mathias taking her arm, and linking it with his own. She almost pulled away, but he held a firm hand to make sure she couldn't go anywhere. They walked around the city, quiet, Mathias occasionally checking to make sure she was still there. (The lack of fuss worried him.)

"Natty. Why'd ya' run away?" He asked, his voice hushed. Natalia couldn't tell if he was so quiet due to the sounds of the city, or because he was talking under his breath. There was something just…

_Not right_ about it.

"Y… I was embarrassed. I didn't want to start a fight." She mumbled, looking out at the cars passing them by. It was wonderful, to her, at least. She listened to the honking horns, felt the chilling breeze on her icy skin. It was like a little General Winter followed her wherever she went, like he was caressing her doll-face right now.

She opened her eyes, having felt something touch her forehead. A blush crept up to her cheeks, but it was nearly too cold, her having not brought a jacket to wear.  
"All ya' had to do was tell me not to say it again. I don't want ya' mad at me, Natty. You're too cute."

His hands were fire against her snowflake-skin. His skin had scars on it, just like her. It was tattered and torn, form years of fighting and war and torment. From watching soldier after soldier die, from watching the losses of the country re-run in his head.

Just like Natalia. Just like how she scarred herself, how her brother did, how her sister did. The explosions of Chernobyl, the mass grave by Minsk, the attack from the Nazis, it was Hell beyond her dreams, and he knew the feeling. Perhaps what made her want him so badly was his bravery in following her, in caressing her as they spoke. Maybe it was how cute he was, when he complimented her. It was a never-ending hunger to devour this man, to feel him, to hold him, to love him.

She was a devil. It's all he could think throughout the night. A little devil sitting on his hips, clawing at his back, gasping little moans and curses at him. Half the time, it made him more excited than he needed to be, and it drove him absolutely mad. She slept next to him, curled up, her hair a silver halo on the pillow. He kissed her neck, before turning over, and drifting into sleep.


	6. Epilogue

Natalia rose form her bed, stretching eagerly. She looked around her room, eyes scanning the pale blue walls with wooden furniture. She wasn't sure when she'd been brought home last night, but the sunlight that poured in through her window let her know she had woken up late in the afternoon. She climbed out of the bed, her dress from the night before wrinkled, and no Mathias lying next to her. She grimaced, before sauntering out of the room, half asleep. All she really knew was that she was awake and awake late in the evening.

She walked into her kitchen, and found it empty. The dishes were done and put away, the floor was swept, and there was nothing missing. Not even her knives. The living room was cleaned, dusted, and the television wiped down. A silvery eyebrow rose in question at the lack of mess she usually found from her lover, Mathias. Albeit it was nice that he'd cleaned up after coming home from a party last night, she was slightly unnerved by his sudden disappearance. Especially since Secret Santa (something Finland and America came up with) was today at the World Meeting. Although she was worried of tardiness, she took her time getting dressed in her usual blue dress with white apron and black bow. She slipped on her mary janes and exited the house, before readying herself to get to the conference.

She was sitting in her seat on the bus, staring coldly out the window next to her. She was just as cold towards others as per usual, except Mathias, of course. She'd hardly spoken to her brother, who often mentioned being "ashamed" of such a disobedient sister with such "low standards." Besides, she did try to strangle him over two years ago. She walked into the large building, stepped into the elevator alone, and waited for it to reach the twelfth floor. She heard a small ding! And stepped off, digging in her large tote bag for the blue and silver gift. She had to give a gift to some random person she picked from a glass bowl, and she usually got her sister Ukraine. This year, she'd bought her sister a pink hairband with henna-like designs engraved on it. (Courtesy of that Turkish pervert, not knowing what woman he needs to keep his hands off of.) As she stood in front of the doors, she calmed her nerves and took a deep breath. She opened the doors, stepping in, and looked up in slight fear. She'd not been seen since she had attacked Ivan, so many nations thought she was a recluse. They had probably pulled her name from the Christmas drawing, too. As she looked around, no one had noticed she'd entered, for most were arguing. She stepped forward, moving slowly to her seat to keep any attention away from her.

"Guys, it's Belarus." Someone said, she thought it was France, or Prussia, maybe China? Probably China. She looked up, her eyes catching Alfred's in an awkward stand-off. Before she let him get to her, she turned her attention to the others, and waved, hardly.

"Hello…" She mumbled, making it to her seat and sitting down. She put the box on the table, and looked up expectantly. Her first instinct was to ask for Ivan, or maybe Mathias, since neither one had arrived yet, but instead she looked cold and cruel as always.

"Miss Belarus, a pleasure to see you back again." England said, smiling at her hesitantly. Natalia almost sneered; thanks to the fact she could see he was afraid she'd stab him. She nodded her head, before standing. She dug her hand into the glass bowl, and pulled out the name.

_I got Liechtenstein this time. Interesting…_Natalia sat back down, knowing her name was not added to the bowl, nor was she going to get another gift. She was alright with that. She looked around as the others began to drift back into conversation, and finally located the younger girl. She walked over, and tapped her lightly on the shoulder.

"Lili… When do we begin handing out the presents?" She asked in monotone, not wanting to make it obvious that Lili was her receiver. The young girl smiled at Natalia, as she always did, and said, "Once Mr. Russia and Mr. Denmark come, we will hand out all the presents." Natalia nodded her head, sitting next to the girl, her cheek resting in the palm of her hand. She tapped her fingers on the desk lightly, growing slightly unnerved by the strange looks she was receiving. Had she really been gone that long? Natalia lay her head on the table, her mind fluttering to when Matthias first said he loved her. Her reminiscing was turned short, and the girl raised her head as the doors began to open. A small smile crossed her face as Matthias sauntered in with his toothy grin, his gravity-defying locks the color of honey. Her smile faltered and disappeared, though, as a certain giant loomed behind him as well.

"Well, now that we're all here, we can hand out our gifts!" England laughed, and as always, he was the first to give his gift. This year, he had Cuba.

"Well, maybe not something that would interest you too much, but this year I bought tickets for a Shakespearean play going on in America's home." Cuba thanked him for the gift, and then the nations bustled to find their respective recipients. Natalia stood quietly, grabbing Lili's sleeve almost meekly. "Lili, this is for you… I took special care in making sure it might be something you or sestra would enjoy." Although it was rare for Belarus, of all people, to even announce she'd taken care into something, the girl smiled sweetly and opened the little box, the blue and silver paper folding patiently with her gentle hands. The girl took out the hairband and stared at it in awe, before smiling in innocence and gratitude. "It is beautiful, Miss Belarus! I am very happy, danke!" She exclaimed, before setting off to find whoever she owed a gift. It did not surprise Natalia that no one addressed her, for she knew no one would. Matthias had to give France a gift, who at the time grabbed Matthias' butt and laughed.

At the end of the exchange, all were saying grace at the large table, the dinner set attentively in front of them. England said the prayer, and all began to feast. It was quiet, for the meetings, and all were happy and kind to one another. Natalia sat between Ivan and Katyusha, as always, and she and Matthias shared looks to one another. As she turned to answer a question her sister had asked, she heard the clinking of silverware on glass.

"Attention, attention!": Matthias shouted, standing once all were quiet and focused on him. He gave them a sheepish grin, making his way slowly to the cold nation of Belarus, who watched him in confusion.

"I know I'm not the only one who noticed that Miss Belarus here did not receive a gift," he began, tsking at the thought that they withdrew her name, "So I made sure to get her one." He dug in his pocket, before pulling Belarus' chair out. She eyed him with questioning thoughts as he pulled out a small red and white box. She figured he'd bought her more tickets to that Lego place he always went to. He opened it slowly, and all eyes widened in shock.

It was simply beautiful. The strawberry chocolate gold ring, with Victorian design swirls cut into it, a princess cut diamond in the center with two smaller ones on each side, and her name- future name- Natalia Kohler, engraved inside.

"So," He laughed at her expression, utterly gorgeous, " Will ya marry me, dear?"

Naturally, the lover said yes.


End file.
